By Tom Disch
Mild verse and kooky illustrations make grammar their playground
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Additional resources for A child's garden of grammar
Page 23 If/Then If/Then is a wonderful machine. If you use soap, then you'll be clean. If you do this, I'll give you that. A wagging tail will earn a pat. Page 24 His Life's a Die That's Never Thrown, Page 25 Maybe Maybe works another way: Maybe might come out and play But maybe not, he cannot say. For Maybe's acts are not his own: His life's a die that's never thrown, A Phantom jet that's not been flown. Although he might, he might not, too: He could be me, he could be you. Page 26 Not, That Nasty Little Snot Page 27 Not Not, that nasty little snot, Must always disagree.
Page 26 Not, That Nasty Little Snot Page 27 Not Not, that nasty little snot, Must always disagree. If you express the simplest thought, He'll say it cannot be. He'll look you in the eye and say Your nose is not your own. " Page 28 Yes, in is in, Without a Doubt, and Just as Clearly Out is Out. Page 29 In and Out Guess who's the in preposition this year And who, word has it, is out on her ear? Yes, In is in, without a doubt, And just as clearly Out is out. In is sleekly, chicly thin; Poor Out is overweight and old.
Page 72 Page 73 You and I If I were you, who would I be? Not me, because I would be you. I'd have your name and wear your clothes, And if I wrote, I'd write your prose, Which would not be like me at all. Give me a call. Page 74 Page 75 Page 76 He, She, and It Page 77 Page 78 Page 79 Page 80 Page 81 Thou, Thee, and Thine There was a time--it's long gone now- When thee was you, and you were thou. I've always been myself, a me, But how fondly I remember thee! The whole world now is yours and mine That once, my love, was ours and thine.
A child's garden of grammar by Tom Disch